There Will Be A Day

Andrew Joseph Chappon
March 21, 1980- October 23, 2008

I feel like I am drowning in the brokenness of this world. All that I have to hold onto is Jesus and the hope of eternity with Him. I found out on Friday that a good friend of mine passed away on Thursday Oct. 23. Even as I write this blog entry I am still in complete shock. I wish someone could just pinch me really hard and I could wake up from this horrible dream. Praise God that we can have hope that one day there will be no more brokenness.

“There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, no more fears.
There will be a day when the burdens of this place will be no more; we’ll see Jesus face to face.
But until that day we will hold on to you always.” Jeremy Camp

I look forward to the day when I will stand before Jesus with my friend Andy and we will bow down before our Savior together. Until then my dear friend you will be missed greatly.

No More Circles

On Sunday I went to a corn maze to celebrate the fall months and welcome the frigid air. The maze started out surprisingly easy. I began to think to myself, “come on this is not what mazes are about. They are about getting lost and the challenge of finding your way out.” Of course it wasn’t long though before we began to walk in circles and get frustrated over passing the same signs over and over. It is funny how when things are too easy we say, “bring on the challenges,” yet when the challenges come we get frustrated and begin complaining. This pretty much defines my last two weeks, lost (hence no blog update in that time). In these two weeks I subbed for two different classes, both pretty challenging groups. I found myself being short with the students and turning into the kind of teacher I despise. I felt far from gracious and loving and literally felt like I was walking in circles. I got frustrated with myself because I wasn’t handling things the way that I thought I could. I began to complain to friends when things were not going the way that I wanted. This time back in Washington is supposed to be about spending time with family/friends, support raising, and teaching on the side because I love teaching. But here I was over committing myself and allowing this stress to pour into my life that just caused me to become someone that I am not. My breaking point was Tuesday night. You know that point when you come to the end of yourself and you finally realize that trying to do things by your own strength gets you nowhere. Praise God for these times and things that knock me in the head and remind me that I need Jesus. Because of the strength of Jesus and His grace and love I was able to end my day on Friday with a smile and even cheer on some of the students in their school soccer game.

On Sunday I had the privilege of speaking at my home church. Through speaking the Lord reminded me of the vision, passion, and desires that He has placed within my heart. How amazing that just a week ago my heart felt cold and hard, yet today through Jesus I am filled instead with joy and warmth. And even though being filled with joy and warmth is enough, Jesus also blessed me through encouraging words from my fellow brothers and sisters. After I shared I received so many kind words and so many were interested in hearing more about southern Sudan. And the awesomeness continued through getting an opportunity to meet one of the Lost Boys who just happened to show up to my home church on this Sunday of all Sundays. I couldn’t have hidden my excitement even if I tried. As people came up to me to ask more questions, I wanted to answer them, but I was more excited to introduce this man I don’t even know because it is stories like his that draw my heart more and more to s. Sudan. It was a day full of undeserved blessings.

I praise God for reawakening my neediness and helping me realize that I was getting lost in my circumstances. He is the one that I am living for and therefore there is no reason I should feel lost.
“In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling.” Exodus 15:13

Moldy Shoes

I was at the shoe store today. As I opened the box, ready to try on the shoes the salesman just brought me I smelled a familiar pungent odor. Sure enough as I lifted the paper lying over the shoes I could see the evidence; moldy shoes. Not something you would expect at an American retail store. I did not freak out or get grossed out; instead I couldn’t help but laugh. The salesman was probably surprised when I brought the box back to him laughing, asking for another pair to try. For over two years I lived in a place where if I wasn’t careful with how I stored things or cleaned things mold would most definitely show up. I remember many occasions when I would open a trunk and be forced to breath in that nice fragrant fungus. I was never surprised to find moldy clothes, shoes, sheets etc. One time when I was traveling I decided to shove all my dirty clothes into one backpack and just left it like that until I returned back home. I think I may have put a slightly damp garment in there as well. Anyways, I am sure you can imagine what I found when that backpack was finally opened.

So although these are not the most pleasant of experiences, I am still thankful for the smile and laughter they bring. I am thankful for anything that floods me with memories of a place, person, or time that I love, even moldy shoes.